I have not been practicing yoga. I have not meditated or let my mind wander off. There has been such a decline in my mental health lately that I am afraid to. Monday mornings night terror scared me so much I need my counsellor, I need to talk about what is going on in my mind. I also am considering hypnotherapy.
Since my breakdown I have explored many interesting concepts of the conscious and unconscious mind. I spent many sleepless nights of my insomnia reading about meditation, out of body experience and holistic healing.
I feel I am unable to visualise the future right now due to my fears. I am stuck in my past. I am not mindful I am scared. My mood is so low right now that not even breathing techniques can calm me.
My only respite is reading.
Yesterday I read Healing Deep Hurt Within – The transformational journey of a young patient undergoing regression therapy by Dr Peter Mack a fascinating account of one women’s use of hypnotherapy to heal her mental illness. Today I am going to the library to find more books on hypnotherapy and holistic healing.
For me understanding this phase of my life is extremely important and as I am not getting any satisfaction from my medical team I am looking elsewhere for answers and I urge you to do the same. There is an abundant of information out there.
I believe things happen for a reason. I believe situations and information is presented to you as and when you most need it. Although I feel sad and low I am excited to visit the library as I know I will come away with something I need. I will simply walk along the aisle until the right book catches my eye.
I hope this post catches the eye of the reader who also needs it. Sometimes I wonder what is going on, is this really happening to me and why but I know there is a reason and maybe it is simply to show another that they are not alone.