my medication is not working for me again and the familiar descent back into my old habits are shockingly easy to resume. It always begins with me appearing to get ready for a normal nights rest, for me this is a late night and early morning, these few hours constitute a good nights rest, but during my ‘insomnia sleep’ I fall ‘asleep’ or into a lucid dream around eleven pm only to wake one hour or ninety minutes later and commence the wait until sunrise!
Mostly I write. Or blog, or both.
On a positive note I met someone new a few days ago who is learned, calm and matches me on many levels. We exchange in a certain type of intellectual conversation that stimulates me greatly. He is fast becoming an interesting part of my day as we start to make more and more time for one another. This natural platonic relationship is far my best kind. I adore people and their fascinating lives. It reminds me of university. This is the part of university that I keep with me always like Mariana Keegans ‘Opposite of Lonliness’ in practice I guess. Actively engaging in the sharing of wild ideas, hashing out plans for imaginary P.hd’s, being together in unstructured messy ways – being together as society nostalgically would like us to be but we rarely are. Being, simply being ourselves outside of the confines of work, church or home, just as we are.