I am often working or travelling in my dreams and I seem to be quite busy doing things that I used to do. Last night I had only two dreams, that’s really poor for me and a clear sign that I am having trouble sleeping. In the first dream I travelled to Latvia by coach. It takes a day and half. I wear a mask almost the entire time which was awful. The coach was packed with travellers mostly speaking Latvian and I do not remember why I travel there but as soon as I arrive I want to return home. In the second dream I join an Estate Agents and one of the female employees decides to treat me like the new girl, jeopardising my new deal and I am told off by my Managers.
It is my fist day and the girls in the office are all smiles and ask me lots of questions. They find out I owned a beauty salon and on our lunch break a girl I knew at primary school asks me to paint her nails and although I do not want to I reluctantly agree. In the kitchen, away from the others, she asks me to Shellac her toes instead (a longer, more permanent procedure) and feeling pressured but not wanting to say no I set about wasting the hour doing something I no longer do. I get annoyed. I am losing my own chance to eat. I feel stupid but can’t stand up for myself.
The staff kitchen is above a Chinese restaurant next door which is old and dusty. It is not a good place to do nails and my colleague complains to me despite this being her request. There is a commotion downstairs and we are asked to leave. I tidy up as my colleague walks out unimpressed with her unfinished nails. I overhear that the Chinese baby has been rushed to hospital and later dies. I try to console the family. They say they will move back to China so I organise for a valuation and take them on as a client.
I am late returning to work and miss out on an important selling opportunity as a client came into the office asking for me by name. I have to explain to my Manager what has happened. He is not impressed and tells me off. My colleague tries to interrupt, seemingly intent on throwing me under the bus but I am fed up of her and stand up for myself – she has made a fool of me – did she deliberately waste my time in order for me to miss my client?
I realise that I am no fool. I no longer do nails, I am no longer a push over. I may have missed my lunch and not returned in time to speak with a client but I have gained a valuable client with the Chinese property. I am not here to paint her nails; I am here to make money. I make my intentions clear to the whole office and my Manager praises me for my initiative. Later my colleague buys the office cookies to make amends for disrespecting me. She smile her fake smile at me so I take a cookie and move my desk to the front window away from the office girls and their politics. I am no longer the old me, hello new V.
~ Last night I listened to a podcast on Jung and dreaming. I have been recording my dreams all summer but no longer use the Jungian dream key. These two dreams are interesting to me. I no longer travel by bus/coach and the second dream is rather telling. I will muse on it for a while but yes, something has changed forever. During my twenties many were shocked that I decided to open a beauty salon. Beauticians were looked down upon as many trades people are. I have no idea why as it is a detailed, skilled profession albeit a severely underpaid industry. I rose up and opened my salon but after my degree Professionals would remark that I was somehow inferior as I was ‘a former beautician’ or worse ‘a hairdresser’. This type of bullying in the office was extremely damaging however in this dream I turn it around and leave the bitches to it. I do fear that I will be bullied in my new job and I think I will discuss this with Helen at our next session. ~