The Big Thank You

I’m up late listening to emotive music, drinking wine and wondering if I’ll continue this practice of staying up late thinking (and drinking ) for much longer? I don’t know. I ponder whether this is a creative outlet, an inability to sleep or simply part of my routine? The last few weeks have been so…

Death of a friend

The news of the death hits me a few days after I hear it. Instantly something feels different, life is changed somehow. On Monday evening I am stoic, ‘I’m ok, I’m fine’ I tell my friends, but, I cannot sleep, awake through the hours and calling in sick the next day. Tuesday is a blur.…

The Moon in the last degrees of Aquarius

The moon is looking at me in it’s waning gibbous state. I eyeball it suspiciously as have given my last six weeks to humanitarian causes, but, I am feeling different tonight, I want to enjoy myself. For weeks I have dealt with the lives of others, working long hours and volunteering on my days off.…

The Bank Holiday Weekend

It’s 23:23, I’m awake and need to communicate. Two years ago today I was with my Irish best friend in a hotel, having spent the day at a festival, our delightful annual treat. I would tell her how much I loved her, how much I missed her and we would smile as we fell asleep,…

Awake at 4am

Not ‘kinda awake’ but fully awake at 4am I begin to search for reasons why. Over the last several months work has been boring, uninspiring and monotonous, so I applied for a secondment and I was sky rocketed back into my needs, wants and desires. Over the last two weeks excitement has propelled me forward…

An Arty Farty Idea Revisited

In May 2017 I excitedly wrote that I had an idea I wanted to try out. Four years later, the idea remains as does a crippling fear that I cannot make it happen. In the last post I claim to make art that made me happy, but, the truth is, I am searching for something…

Roses & Abstract BodyArt

I dream I am setting up at a summer fete. we have a pitch that is quite far from the main attractions, slightly overgrown and weedy. It is both inside a shed and the open space in front – it is like a weird allotment space. My Dad starts to tell me where things should…

The dream with the citrine quartz

I am dreaming something miserable. I am walking alone, bereft, depressed in a grey world. I board a bus, it is going towards London. I see a snowflake from the window and as the bus turns a corner, glassy bright Christmas market lights. It is late but I alight and head to Fenwicks before it…